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I am going to address a question Iโ€™ve been getting.

I am going to address a question Iโ€™ve been getting.

  • 13 April, 2024
  • Emily Kimelman

One that I think people consider a โ€œgotchaโ€ question.

๐˜๐˜ด ๐˜ช๐˜ต ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฌ๐˜ข๐˜บ ๐˜ง๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ ๐˜ข ๐˜ธ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฎ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ต๐˜ฆ๐˜ญ๐˜ญ ๐˜ข ๐˜ฎ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ด๐˜ฎ๐˜ช๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ?

No, dumb fuck, itโ€™s not.

But, at the same time, itโ€™s not the same as a man telling a woman to smile, because spoiler alert, women are not equal to men in our society.

Thatโ€™s why we get the smile comment WAY more, why our a**es and t*ts get groped in public, why victims of sexual assault are not believed, and why we can have a president who brags about grabbing women by the ๐Ÿˆ. And Supreme Court justices accused of sexual assault and harassment making society-altering decisions about bodily autonomy.

When a man tells a woman to smile, itโ€™s not the same as the reverse. Men don't get assaulted for turning down women's advances. It's not dangerous for a man to refuse to smile. It definitely could be for a woman.

Men rarely have their junk grabbed by a random woman, and I literally cannot count the number of times men have grabbed me in public. Just a hand grabbing my body with bruising strength because they were raised to think they have that right

When a man tells a woman to smile, she has to calculate her safety before responding. So no, it's not okay to tellย anyoneย what to do with their face. But when a woman tells a man to smile, it's inappropriate, when a man tells a woman to smile, it's a threat whether intended or not. It is threatening for a man to demand something of a woman's body.ย 

If you donโ€™t like that fact, join the club. I hate it. It sucks. But donโ€™t get mad at me, Iโ€™m just the messenger. You want to do something about it? Letโ€™s burn down white supremacist patriarchy together. Start by protecting womenโ€™s right to control their bodies.

Itโ€™s fucked up to tell a woman to smile. Itโ€™s even more fucked up to tell her she has to give birth to her rapist baby. Or wait until sepsis kicks in before a dead fetus can be removed from her womb. Or that even though sheโ€™s not ready to be a mother, the asshole who convinced her heโ€™dย just put in the tipย lied and now she is facing the consequences of his actions. Or that even though she used birth control and it failed her, so has society because we donโ€™t think she deserves to make her own decisions about family planning.

So, yeah, donโ€™t tell anyone to smile. And donโ€™t vote for men who brag about sexually assaulting women. And reinstate women's right to bodily autonomy. And definitely do not show up in my comment section confused about why men shouldn't tell women to smile. If you don't get it, no one can help you. And being around you sucks for those of us not willfully ignorant to the toxic dynamics in society.

It sucks so much I've made a career out of writing vigilante crime thrillers to deal with it.

๐—ฆ๐˜†๐—ฑ๐—ป๐—ฒ๐˜† ๐—ฅ๐˜†๐—ฒ ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐—ฑ๐—ผ๐—ด, ๐—•๐—น๐˜‚๐—ฒ, ๐—ฒ๐˜…๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐˜ ๐—ท๐˜‚๐˜€๐˜๐—ถ๐—ฐ๐—ฒ ๐˜„๐—ถ๐˜๐—ต ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ด๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฐ๐—ฒ. ๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ฑ๐—ผ๐—ด ๐—ฑ๐—ผ๐—ฒ๐˜€๐—ปโ€™๐˜ ๐—ฑ๐—ถ๐—ฒ, ๐—ฏ๐˜‚๐˜ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ฏ๐—ฎ๐—ฑ ๐—ด๐˜‚๐˜†๐˜€ ๐—ฑ๐—ผ. In bloodthirsty, vigilante, super satisfying ways. ๐˜ˆ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ช๐˜ตโ€™๐˜ด ๐˜ค๐˜ข๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ค ๐˜ˆ๐˜.

Start the Sydney Rye Mysteries today.

And next time youโ€™re not sure whether to tell a person to smile, stfu and keep walking to your local congressperson's office to demand an equal society. Because THAT would make us smile. ๐Ÿ˜

๐Ÿ“šย Pay what you want for the first 8 Sydney Rye Mysteries in ebook or digital audiobook. Save 40% on paperbacks:

๐Ÿ“šย Continue the adventure with books 9-12:

๐Ÿ“šย Catch up with books 13-15:

๐Ÿ“˜ย Readย Relentless, Sydney Mysteries Book 16:

๐Ÿ“—ย Download the newest release,ย Jagged Truth, Sydney Rye Mysteries Book 17:

๐Ÿ“—ย Preorderย Brutal Mercy, Sydney Rye Mysteries Book 18:ย

โ˜•๏ธ If youโ€™ve read all the Sydney Rye Mysteries and preorderedย Brutal Mercy,ย THANK YOU.

The best way to reward yourself for all of that reading is with your very own mug, tote, or wine tumbler with one of the quotes from the series, check out my exclusive merchandise:

Brutal Mercyย is currently being edited, and I hope to share an update soon!

Until next week...


P.S.ย I promise the dog doesnโ€™t dieโ€ฆbut I make no assurances about anyone else.ย ๐Ÿ˜ˆ

P.P.S. You should unfollow me now if you have issues with "strong" language, sex out of wedlock, or LGBTQ+ characters. ๐Ÿ‘ˆ Top 3 things my one-star reviews complain about.


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