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Dumpster Fire...

Dumpster Fire...

  • 23 March, 2024
  • Emily Kimelman

You’re pretty sure...

The world is a dumpster fire, and no amount of fresh water—which we are running out of anyway—can smother the flames.

One of our major political parties is under the control of a walking, talking Cheeto. And a disturbing number of people think he was sent here by THE deity. 🥴

Codifying birth control passed by WAY too slim a margin with 96% of the Cheeto’s team voting against it. 🤯

And bodily autonomy is no longer protected for any person wielding a uterus. 🤬

I could go on…🌎🔥🌊💀…but you get what I’m talking about.

And I know you’re doing everything you can.

✅ Voting
✅ Talking to friends
✅ Taking care of your loved ones

And you’re probably even doing some stuff for your own mental health.

🗣 Meeting with a therapist or coach
🌳 Taking walks, exercising, practicing yoga, or pilates, or both!
📵 Avoiding doom scrolling while also staying informed—a delicate freaking dance 💃

I get it. Trust me.

The best defense I have against losing my mind is writing books.

📚 I write feminist action novels. They are fun and satisfying. My books are a great way to avoid:

🤯 Losing your 💩 on strangers
😰 Curling up in a corner shaking with anxiety
😵‍💫 And a host of other negative symptoms associated with living through the Handmaid’s Tale 2020’s edition.

Sydney Rye and her dog, Blue, exact justice with a vengeance. The dog doesn’t die but the bad guys do. And it feels GOOD.

Like kneeing the traitorous grapist in the groin good, but without the legal repercussions.

The Sydney Rye Mysteries are available in ebook, paperback, and digital audiobook.

🎧 You can listen to my books while you walk, clean, cook, or burn down white supremacist patriarchy. ❤️‍🔥

💨 If you’re on the move, Sydney and Blue can come with you.

📚 I’ve bundled the first 8 books into a set, and you can get it for whatever price you want. The paperbacks at 40% off.

⏳ Take the time you need
🏝️ Enjoy the adventure you deserve
🏎️ Escape the dystopian reality you’re being forced into by whack jobs with flag fetishes.🇺🇸

📚 Start the Sydney Rye Mysteries today ☄️

📚 Pay what you want for the first 8 Sydney Rye Mysteries in ebook or digital audiobook. Save 40% on paperbacks:

📚 Continue the adventure with books 9-12:

📚 Catch up with books 13-15:

📘 Read Relentless, Sydney Mysteries Book 16:

📗 Download the newest release, Jagged Truth, Sydney Rye Mysteries Book 17:

📗 Preorder Brutal Mercy, Sydney Rye Mysteries Book 18:

☕️ If you’ve read all the Sydney Rye Mysteries and preordered Brutal Mercy, THANK YOU.

The best way to reward yourself for all of that reading is with your very own mug, tote, or wine tumbler with one of the quotes from the series, check out my exclusive merchandise:

Avoid the fire, read a book! 


P.S. Relentless, Sydney Rye Mysteries Audiobook #16, is LIVE in my bookstore and via Audible: 🎉🥳

P.P.S. I promise the dog doesn’t die…but I make no assurances about anyone else. 😈

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