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People like to tell me they won't read my books...
- 14 June, 2025
- Emily Kimelman
Because of something I've said online.
Perfect. Awesomeโliterally how I planned it.
Do not read my books if...
๐ซ Youโre not a feminist.
๐ซ You think โDEIโ and โwokenessโ are ruining America.
๐ซ Masked men disappearing people is cool with you.
๐ซ You believe limiting the rights of women and the LGBTQAi+ community is somehow protecting your rights. ๐๐ฑ๐ฐ๐ช๐ญ๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ข๐ญ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ต: ๐ฑ๐ฆ๐ฐ๐ฑ๐ญ๐ฆ ๐ฉ๐ข๐ท๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ด๐ข๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ณ๐ช๐จ๐ฉ๐ต๐ด ๐ข๐ด ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ช๐ด ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ต ๐ข๐ฏ ๐ช๐ฏ๐ง๐ณ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ๐ฆ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ต ๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ ๐ณ๐ช๐จ๐ฉ๐ต๐ด. ๐๐ตโ๐ด ๐ค๐ข๐ญ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ฆ๐ฒ๐ถ๐ข๐ญ๐ช๐ต๐บ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ช๐จ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ณ๐ข๐ฏ๐ต %^&*.
๐ซ You think men who brag about grabbing women by the ๐ should be President instead of imprisoned.
๐ซ You think climate change is a hoax.
๐ซ You donโt understand abortion is healthcare.
๐ซ You want cheap eggs more than you hate Naziโs.
๐ซ The list goes onโฆ
You mother$%^&*!s cannot handle my books and that is on purpose.
๐ ๐ง๐ต๐ฒ๐ ๐ฎ๐ฟ๐ฒ ๐ป๐ผ๐ ๐ณ๐ผ๐ฟ ๐๐ผ๐.
Stop acting like I want your attention. I seriously want you to stay as far away from me as possible. You creep me out.
Please, for the love of all things, %^&* off. Go comment on something you do like. I donโt want you here.
The rest of you should take advantage of my pay-what-you-want offer for the first 8 Sydney Rye Mysteries in ebook or digital audiobook. Paperbacks are 40% off.
๐๐ฎ๐๐ฃ๐๐ฎ ๐๐ฎ๐ ๐๐ฃ๐ ๐๐๐ง ๐๐ค๐, ๐ฝ๐ก๐ช๐, ๐๐ญ๐๐๐ฉ ๐๐ช๐จ๐ฉ๐๐๐ ๐ฌ๐๐ฉ๐ ๐ ๐ซ๐๐ฃ๐๐๐๐ฃ๐๐. ๐๐๐ ๐๐ค๐ ๐๐ค๐๐จ๐ฃโ๐ฉ ๐๐๐, ๐๐ช๐ฉ ๐ฉ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ช๐ฎ๐จ ๐๐ค. They're not for everyone, but if you made it this far in my email, the Sydney Rye Mysteries are probably for you.
๐ย Pay what you want for the first 8 Sydney Rye Mysteries in ebook or digital audiobook. Save 40% on paperbacks:
emilykimelman.com/SR18
๐ย Continue the adventure with books 9-12:
emilykimelman.com/SR912
๐ย Catch up with books 13-15:
emilykimelman.com/SR1315
๐ย Catch up with books 16-18:
emilykimelman.com/SR1618
๐ย Preorderย Feral Vengeance, Sydney Rye Mysteries Book 19:
emilykimelman.com/FV
**This preorder is for 2026, so please be aware it wonโt arrive until then.**
๐ย If youโre all caught up with Sydney Rye, readย A Spy is Born, Starstruck Thrillers Book 1:
emilykimelman.com/SB
๐ย If you read book 1,ย Lone Spy, Starstruck Thrillers Book 2 is now available:
emilykimelman.com/LoS
โ๏ธ If youโve read all the Sydney Rye Mysteries and Starstruck Thrillers THANK YOU.
The best way to reward yourself for all of that reading is with your very own mug, tote, or wine tumbler with quotes from the books, check out my exclusive merchandise:
emilykimelman.com/Merch
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