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People like to tell me...

People like to tell me...

  • 21 June, 2024
  • Emily Kimelman

They won't read my books because of something I've said online.

Perfect. Awesomeโ€”thatโ€™s exactly how I planned it.

Do not read my books if...

๐Ÿšซ Youโ€™re not a feminist.
๐Ÿšซ You think โ€œwokenessโ€ is a scourge.
๐Ÿšซ You believe limiting the rights of women and the LGBTQ+ community is somehow protecting your rights.ย Spoiler alert: people having the same rights as you is not an infringement on your rights. Itโ€™s called equality you ignorant %^&*.
๐Ÿšซ Youโ€™re not sure which Presidential candidate is a traitor.
๐Ÿšซ You think climate change is a hoax.
๐Ÿšซ You donโ€™t understand abortion is healthcare.
๐Ÿšซ The list goes onโ€ฆ

You mother$%^&*!s cannot handle my booksโ€”thatโ€™s on purpose.

๐Ÿ‘‰ ๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ๐˜† ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜ ๐—ณ๐—ผ๐—ฟ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚.

Stop acting like I want your attention. I seriously want you to stay as far away from me as possible.

So please, for the love of all things, %^&* off. Go comment on something you do like. I donโ€™t want you here.

The rest of you should take advantage of my pay-what-you-want offer for the first 8 Sydney Rye Mysteries in ebook or digital audiobook. Paperbacks are 40% off.

๐™Ž๐™ฎ๐™™๐™ฃ๐™š๐™ฎ ๐™๐™ฎ๐™š ๐™–๐™ฃ๐™™ ๐™๐™š๐™ง ๐™™๐™ค๐™œ, ๐˜ฝ๐™ก๐™ช๐™š, ๐™š๐™ญ๐™–๐™˜๐™ฉ ๐™Ÿ๐™ช๐™จ๐™ฉ๐™ž๐™˜๐™š ๐™ฌ๐™ž๐™ฉ๐™ ๐™– ๐™ซ๐™š๐™ฃ๐™œ๐™š๐™–๐™ฃ๐™˜๐™š. ๐™๐™๐™š ๐™™๐™ค๐™œ ๐™™๐™ค๐™š๐™จ๐™ฃโ€™๐™ฉ ๐™™๐™ž๐™š, ๐™—๐™ช๐™ฉ ๐™ฉ๐™๐™š ๐™—๐™–๐™™ ๐™œ๐™ช๐™ฎ๐™จ ๐™™๐™ค. They're not for everyone, but if you made it this far in my email, the Sydney Rye Mysteries are probably for you.

๐Ÿ“šย Pay what you want for the first 8 Sydney Rye Mysteries in ebook or digital audiobook. Save 40% on paperbacks:

๐Ÿ“šย Continue the adventure with books 9-12:

๐Ÿ“šย Catch up with books 13-15:

๐Ÿ“˜ย Readย Relentless, Sydney Mysteries Book 16:

๐Ÿ“—ย Download the newest release,ย Jagged Truth, Sydney Rye Mysteries Book 17:

๐Ÿ“—ย Preorderย Brutal Mercy, Sydney Rye Mysteries Book 18:

โ˜•๏ธ If youโ€™ve read all the Sydney Rye Mysteries and preorderedย Brutal Mercy,ย THANK YOU.

The best way to reward yourself for all of that reading is with your very own mug, tote, or wine tumbler with one of the quotes from the series, check out my exclusive merchandise:

๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰ย Don't forget...Brutal Mercyย is coming your way next week!ย ๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰

The count down is on...



P.S. I promise the dog doesn't die but make no assurances about anyone else.ย ๐Ÿ˜ˆ

P.P.S. If you didn't see the announcement, Jagged Truth is available in audio via my website. We're still waiting for the other retailers to approve and will announce it once it's available everywhere.ย

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